Airi Mikkela: Escaping the Rio-hype
This blog is a story. I want it to be an honest story about the life as a top athlete. It would be great to mention only the good training sessions I've done this week and last week
I've been playing well and I've also managed to push through the hard intervals that I don't really enjoy. The weights at the gym are slowly starting to feel lighter and all in all my preparations for the next season are going well. However, in this chapter of my story everything is not only easy and fun.
I feel like there are those little traps for me everywhere. Every day there's something that brings up the fact that I didn't make it to the Olympics. I'm already pretty strong and those things don't get through my shell so easily anymore. However, there's always a new sharper knife that hits deep. Facebook and other social medias are constantly filled with Rio updates. There are commercials and programs about the Olympics on TV. People are asking me if I'm going to Rio and how does it feel that I'm not. There are journalists and TV-cameras in our trainings every week, but they are not interviewing me but the person on the other side of the net.
I'm doing my best to fight against these traps and knives and it takes so much energy. It's hard to sleep and I have nightmares. I can suddenly just break down like I did the other day when I started crying after telling a random guy at the gym that "can you f##*@&! stop staring at me!". I don't usually break down like this, it's not normal to me. Actually it's not normal to me to even say something like that.
Sometimes I get those awesome ideas that I could move away and live in the middle of a forest. Build a little cottage, pick berries for breakfast and go fishing to get some dinner. I could run intervals whenever I feel like doing that (which is never) and be happy just by myself in a place where the Olympic hype wouldn't touch me. There is only one big problem in this plan: I'm allergic to fish...
Actually there is also another reason for why I don't just run away and give up. The reason is that I want to play. I really want to win and develop. I guess that's also my biggest worry at the moment - what if I don't get the chance to play anymore because I wasn't good enough? I know I'm still just as good but I just ended up being the second one on the list and the one who's not in the spotlight. And that's why it's much more difficult to find those who still believe in me and want to support me.
Maybe this is only just a test. A chapter in my story which is supposed to test my strength. They say that your strength is measured when you're at your weakest. A good attitude is that you just need to work hard. I'm wondering how they can put the words 'just' and 'work hard' in the same sentence, for me there's a big contradiction. But it's still the best attitude I know.
I want to be mature, smart and strong. I want to be able to handle this, develop as a player and as a person. I also want to help Nanna as much as I can on her way to Rio and be a good training partner for her. I'm happy that we still get along very well and practicing together is helping the both of us. I hope that people can see how hard I'm trying and that they appreciate that.
I'm going back to Denmark on Monday and I'm gonna continue hard work there. The traps and knives will be there no matter how hard I try to avoid them but apart from that I'm looking forward to the hard practice. I'm gonna be in a great shape soon, both physically and mentally, when I push through one practice after another and overcome all the obstacles. I just need to focus on the positive things, since there are lots of them as well. In some strange way this is so much fun after all.
Van vrijdag 31 januari tot en met zondag 2 februari vinden de FZ FORZA Nederlandse Kampioenschappen 2020 plaats in…
24 januari 2020
Bij de Princess Sirivannavari Thailand Masters 2020 in Bangkok zijn alle Nederlandse koppels al in de eerste ronde uitgeschakeld.
22 januari 2020
Na het vrijwillige Zwitserland-vertrek van Soraya de Visch Eijbergen heeft ook haar eeuwige rivale Gayle Mahulette de conclusie…
21 januari 2020
De badmintonwereldbond heeft bekend gemaakt dat ze het gebruik van synthetische veren shuttles tijdens internationale…
20 januari 2020
Van dinsdag 21 tot en met zondag 26 januari vindt in Bangkok (Thailand) de Princess Sirivannavari Thailand Masters 2020 plaats,…
20 januari 2020
Zaterdag 8 januari mocht Smashing in Wijchen, aantreden tegen Amersfoort. Het beloofde een spannende wedstrijd te worden.
20 januari 2020
Op zondag 19 januari vond het treffen plaats tussen BC Duinwijck en Almere in Haarlem. Op voorhand voor een Duinwijck een lastige…
20 januari 2020
Vorige week nam BC Duinwijck die plek weer over en ging met 4 punten voorsprong de laatste fase in, waarbij zowel Drop Shot als…
19 januari 2020
Meer artikelen over finland
- Nederlanders klaar bij Finnish Open 2019 - Badminton Nederland
- Nederlandse driemaster naar Vantaa voor Finnish Open 2019 - Christ de Rooij
- Grote groep jeugdbadmintonners naar Finland - Redactie
- Three strikes and you're out: Soraya de Visch Eijbergen exits Finnish International in first round - Christ de Rooij
- Organische groene thee en een vliegticket naar Helsinki voor Soraya de Visch Eijbergen - Christ de Rooij
- The next 29 hours... with Airi Mikkela - Airi Mikkela
- Airi Mikkela: over-excitement is hard for the body and mind - Airi Mikkela
- Airi Mikkela: What it is like to try and qualify for the Olympic Games in Rio - Airi Mikkela
- Airi Mikkela: Escaping the Rio-hype - Airi Mikkela
- Airi Mikkela: two weeks since my Rio-dream came crashing down - Airi Mikkela